- by Jared
Would you like to know what Evelyn Tribole told me about intuitive eating?
Evelyn is one of the co-founders of intuitive eating and I am in the final stages of completing my intuitive eating certification.
This snippet of intuitive eating is actually some pretty revolutionary advice. What’s her advice? It came in a few chunks…
1 – Drop Your Expectations – intuitive eating is a nonlinear journey. Don’t rush the process, but be sure that you enjoy the process. For me as a therapist, I cannot rush clients to transform.
2 – Be Compassionate From A Long-Term Perspective – some eating troubles go way back to childhood. Undoing damage in childhood is possible, but our brains were more easily impacted when we were young. So to change our brains years later requires patience, kindness and compassion with an expectation that true healing might take several months to a year, or in some cases longer.
3 – Keep Learning – Intuitive Eating is not some plan to follow. You have to be engaged. There is always more to learn.
Intuitive Eating Revolutionary Commentary:
In these final stages we share stories of problems, struggles, questions and have a little back and forth with Evelyn.
The point of the call was to bring up the situation that was bringing you difficulty and work through it a little bit with Evelyn.
I was super nervous before this group phone call. I knew what topic and story that was giving me troubles.
However, I wasn’t sure how she respond or what she would say to me. I was imagining worst case scenarios where I tell her how things have been going with a client and she tells me I’m doing everything wrong and doesn’t let me finish my certification.
I knew these thoughts were not likely, but I was still pretty nervous.
Intuitive eating is a growing movement And it’s not every day that I get to talk to one of the founders. Furthermore, it’s not every day that I pay money to talk with a founder. Lastly, I’m in the final stages of my certification and I need this conversation to go well to get the certification!
So there is a lot at stake, at least according to my anxious mind before I actually talked with Evelyn.
So the call began and other people on the call shared some of their stories. This made me feel better because I could hear the way Evelyn handled their situations. I was still nervous but when it was my turn to share a story I did share.
The story I shared about was client of mine who had a lot of trauma in their youth and was making slow progress.
This client was interesting because they had a lot of mindfulness training and a lot of counseling. Furthermore, this client firmly believed that dieting had been harmful so they were very excited about intuitive eating.
Nonetheless, despite the training and mindfulness and the excitement about intuitive eating, this client was making very slow progress.
I couldn’t figure it out.
The client and I had a great connection. Client understood and wanted to do the exercises and steps we talked about together. However, a week would go by and nothing would change.
Their behaviors weren’t actually changing.
So I brought this story up to Evelyn and she gave me the words I needed to hear.
She asked me about my own journey, which I had described very briefly. She asked about how long it took me to change some of my bad habits. I replied that I had been on this journey for years and that it had taken me sometimes years to change my bad habits.
Evelyn does a great job of sharing personal stories instead of doing advice, and she shared a story of someone who she had been working with for close to a year and one day the client said this has been the best experience of their life even though they still had problems.
So basically her advice to me was to slow down.
By talking with her I realized about all the expectations I was bringing to this current client that I was talking about in the story.
I realized that just because my other clients had made quicker progress that I wasn’t failing with this client. Just some people have more trauma and food history than others, and this makes their journey to healing and empowerment more gradual.
That’s okay. Main thing I can do is to let go of my expectations and help the person where they’re at.
Now based on the Intuitive Eating certification training program I’m going through, there’s a short post where I’ve condensed all the training into 4 steps to stop binge eating. You can read the 4 steps here.